I came back to Hanoi for the second time a few weeks ago. I took my new acquaintance from the bus to the Ladybird and enjoyed the cheap, delicious food a second time. We watched mice run up and down the walls and we flirted with the waitresses. We weren't those guys necessarily, they initiated the conversation. At least that's my recollection.
Then I went to Sapa and upon returning to Hanoi I decided to go to the Ladybird for my first dinner back in town. This time I was alone. But chatted with some Australian newspaper cartoonist and his second wife on the balcony while I enjoyed a savory vegetable curry. And I noticed the waitresses again. This time, there was a third lovely lady. Do I sound like a perv here? Because I really feel like one. Oh well.
So, my second night in town...hmmm...how about dinner at the 'bird? Why change a good thing? This time I was really eating by myself, but I had my book. Even if I didn't have my book, I don't care much anymore. I can read the back of my napkin. Or stare at people and make them uncomfortable. Whatever works. This time, I enjoyed a nice stir-fried aubergine with black pepper sauce.
I was beginning to feel uneasy about my repeat appearances. The ladies did say "See you tomorrow" upon my departure, which made it slightly more tolerable to walk through the doors on the third night. The third time's a charm I thought. Not really.
But I did ask one of the girls, who was definitely absolutely most certainly flirting with me, if she'd be interested in getting a drink. "You want to see the menu?" No. I tried again. Maybe YOU and I can get a coffee or tea? "Oh, you want a cocktail?" No. I tried again. Would you like to get a drink WITH me? "No." Yes.
The next day, I chose a different restaurant. It left me missing everything about the old place. Decent enough food, cold enough beer, but no character, no cute waitresses and no mice running up walls. So, last night I returned to my old haunt for the fourth time in five days. I think there's a picture of me on the cash register that says "Look out for this guy."
And then today, since today is my finale in Hanoi, at least for now, I went back for a late lunch. To throw them off guard. A surprise attack. They must think I live and die by their food. Well, I do live by it as it provides about half of my daily caloric intake. Today I ordered something different. Well, it was standard fare, but new for me at this place. I went out my comfort zone and ordered fried noodles with vegetables.
I got my plate and was disappointed to see the instant ramen noodles. I swear I'm going to learn how to ask in Vietnamese what kind of noodles they serve. I hate instant noodles! I was momentarily stunned by the lack of proper noodles in this fine establishment. I was even more turned off by my new waitress. No tip for you.
When I dug in to the noodles, I was instant-ly surprised. Pun of course intended. They were good. Like when you go camping and ramen actually tastes good. Strangely, so does the instant oatmeal. Anyway, the point is, I wasn't camping. But see, the ramen tasted good. That old lesson learned again. Never judge a book by it's cover. No, that's not how I wanted to end this one. Let me try again. If at first you don't succeed, try try again. No, that's not it either. A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush. Slow and steady wins the race. Oh, for fuck's sake!
New moral: Just because you have an ugly waitress and the food looks as bad as the person serving it, doesn't mean that is necessarily the case. -Aesop
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